this girl that i only met once is already getting on my nerves. she really really really is! because she id the one who the guy i like likes. and yet she has the nerve to play him. She has the nerve to play him with his brother! See, she actually thinks that his brother likes her too (but he doesnt!) , and she can't choose. How do i know all of this? because my friends digged up dirt on her, and found some things out. I didn't ask her to, but she said she wanted to to it for my benefit, and the brothers. How could she be so stupid? How could she just play him like that?! HOW COULD HE FALL FOR A FAKE LIKE HER?!

ugh! and her stupid laugh haunts me. A HEE HEE A HEE HEE. Heck no! urgh! i seriously make fun of it all the time! xD. She calls everyone manang and ading. That also gets on my nerves. the next time i see her and she comes up to me and says:

Hi Manang, A HEE HEE

i will do this:

Hi Ading A HAH HAH HAH HAH

and the fact that their mom is cool with her also gets me mad >:[. Seriously. She calls her homegirl! what the? ugh! im just mad at her because of what she is doing!

what a decieving person!!

i dont like her! what a pob.

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well, i don't know what to do.
so there's this guy who i've had feelings for for a quite long time. he was so close to me during the summer, and i was so happy. but once school started, we drifted. I don't liek to admit it, but it's most likely because his cousins teased him about me and him. im almost 100 percent sure it was because of what other people said about us, that he started to keep his distance. i shed tears because he was such a good friend for a while. He was someone i felt so comfortable with, and the first guy that i was friends with first before my feelings came afterwards. I was so happy during the summer. and was ironic was that i asked God in the beginning of summer to send me someone that would make me happy. And he sent me someone. But i guess i wasn't specific enough? because right when school started, it all ended. our friendship was put aside for him. he avoided me, and didn't talk to me like before.

and for a while, i thought my feelings for him were gone, because we didn't talk as much as before. and i talked to him occasionally, and didn't care anymore. or atleast i thought i didn't

and then i meet his friend (who is a girl). and when i was talking to him for a bit, she came up to say goodbye. and right in my face, she hugs him so the longest time, and has she hugs him, she looks at me and smiles with a giggle.

and that's when i found out, that i still have feelings for him.

and now, i have a feeling he likes her, and she likes him. not just from that hug, but for more reasons. she made him join badminton. she asks his cousin about him and such. ugh, i don't like this.

what am i to do? i know it's been a long tiem already, and i should let go. but it just hurts so much to know that i was so close, and he snatched himself away from me. that he has someone new, and that i was replaced so easily.

oh well...

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i've never thought it was right, or even possible for me to have feelings for two guys at once. and even if i don't know their feelings towards me are, i feel like im betraying both of them. i know it's not much of a problem for anyone, but for me, it is. because i know that i shouldn't like two guys at once, i feel so wrong. but then again, you can't control your feelings right?

what are the qualities of each?
well one for sure is a nice guy. one of those guys you know would treat a girl right. and that's one reason i have feelings for him. I know that if he had a girlfriend, she wold be treated with respect. He also speaks the truth, and that's always good.

the other one, which i have more feelings more you could say, is kind of the opposite.
this guy can be nice, but he plays around a lot. But i love how he is funny, and he can be understanding. But he's quite a charmer, and i know that girls are already lined up to date him (but are too scared to ask). i have a feeling that if i ever was in a relationship with him, that he could move on so quick to someone else, and i'd still be there wanting to be with him.

i guess when it comes down to it, i like a guy because he would treat me right
and i like another guy because he seems unattainable.

i know this is weird, and i have a feeling i shouldnt, but i do want to put my heart on my sleeve to either one and ask them to give being with me a try.
but that would ruin the friendships i have with both of them.
so for now, i guess i just will live life, and let what happens happens.

oh by the way, merry christmas eve!

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what comes first?
the boyfriend...
or the date?

i honestly, would like to have the boyfriend first x]. Because..i want to make sure the date is like...with someone i know likes me.

and my perfect first date would consist of...
i would go ice skating with him! and he has to be good at ice skating, because i don't know how. And if i fall on my butt, he HAS to pick me up lol. Or else it's dumping time! (j/k).
Then we would eat at Misakis (a sushi bar) and order the rock and roll! (yum yum ^__^)
Then we would walk to Weber Point (memorial/park) and sit on the jungle gym watching the stars, asking each other questions about our past, future plans and such. So yeah, that would be my perfect first date :].

i know, sappy...but it's true. i would have a great time ^__^

anyways, i had such a long nap today, i really shouldn't have slept as long as i did. because so far i only did my math homework. I should work on my essay more.
i need to right the first paragraph. I kinda don't feel like it. And yet, i do feel like it at the same time lol. the essay is about a modern day epic hero. And if i were to write about anything i wanted to, i would write about Chuck Norris, because that guy is the best epic hero out there! lol. But yeah, im sticking to writing about a person i know: My youth leader Ben Asio. I mean, i don't really want to lol. But hey, that's the only person i can think of. haha.

oh!
question of the day!
who would win if they were battling eachother?




OR



pleas vote! i want to know your answer and why :]
thanks!

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song : Cherish - Keep it Fresh
i just love the beat. normally, i'm not into that kinda music. But i guess because my nickname is dannixfresh, that's why i like it :]

anyways....
im happy that my friend has finally started coming to church ^___^
i know it doesn't sound so happy to some of you guys, but im excited!
:]

yeah, tomorrow is the beautiful-stuff-your-self-until-your-full-and-bloated day
or known as Turkey day. But really is named Thanksgiving. So who do i thank this year? well...this list may be a bit long (i'll try to group people up lol)

God
Thanks for being there for me through it all, and lifitng me up when i feel down. I know i let you down, but thank you so much for always taking me back<3. I love you God, amd i'm sorry for anything i have done to you. Thanks for this year, and thanks for the years to come :]

Church Friends - general
Thanks for being there for me in my spiritual walk! And although some of you can be kinda mean, and kinda disrespectful, i sitl love you guys regardless! (Because God wants me to) [lol, just kidding]. Thanks for giving me great laughs all the time guys! Keep growing in your walk with God!

Church Leaders/ Youth
ooh thanks so much for leading me the way you do! Thanks for really putting us into shape, and for the loving rebukes! We wouldn't have grown without it! And even if it was hard to hear the truth, I thank you so much for it :]. Thanks for loving God, and showing me the love! :D

Go - Getters + Mark
oh man oh man! thanks so much for like...always being there for me! Thanks for Laguna beach, and our friendship! It's fun to be around you guys, and i trust you guys fully to the max best buds! :D. Thanks for being my shining stars lol.

________________________________________________

done with thank you's :].

oh! i have an i con for you guys to ponder:



anyways...
happy turkey day!

night, its late! byee! :]

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gamble gamble gamble.

my family GAMBLES. and i honestly superly duperly hate it.
i mean..my family isn't like..addicted to it, but i hate how they go to gamble...
and end up losing so much oney when they come back home.
i grew up hating gambling because it seems like a waste of time.
i get mad because...i feel like my family's life would be happier without it.
and now, my brother is old enought o gamble. And he goes to gamble without telling my parents.
and my parents expect him NOT to gamble, but how can they expect that if they go everytime my aunt asks them to?

i just despise it. I would NEVER gamble. and i mean it for sure, i don't want to deal with that stuff. And plus, one of my friend's parents go WAY more than my parents do, and she doesn't even have enough money to buy food. They almost lost their house, and when i saw her yesterday, she looked much skinnier than usual. :[. If that is what gambling did to her, then what will it do to me?
but maybe imt aking things too seriously. But honestly, i just don't like gambling.
i hate the smell of casinos. i hate the way that people waste so much money. i hate how gambling has changed my friend's life.

but anyways......

on a happier note, i made a music video like a few months ago, and i would liek to share it with you guys! :D the people are my friends, and me lol.



song: Paul Wright - Fly Away

oh nvm, credits gives it away xD

i hope you guys like it :]
the quality sucks because youtube messed it up! :[. But yeah, have fun watching it! :]

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