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I know what I want.
Wednesday. 4.15.20 6:17 am
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Falling in Love
Sunday. 1.19.20 11:47 am
Roger and I are working on ourselves at this point in time. We are friends right now, but I haven’t told many people that. Most people think we are still together.

We broke up because we both have things to sort out before our relationship can truly blossom and grow. For some reason, since our break up, we have been emotionally bonded even more than before. We are opening up about our past, our deepest, darkest secrets, our insecurities, and also the things we are learning each day about ourselves.

We meet once a week now, instead of spending every moment we possibly can together. We still FaceTime and text. But this feels right. It’s like we are back to dating all over again.

Seeing both of us grow at this time of our lives makes me feel like I have a healthy relationship for the first time in my life. We are putting each others needs first. With that being said, we are not stopping eachother from becoming the people we want to be, and the people we are meant to be.

I feel loved. I feel respected. I feel honored by Roger. I hope he feels the same way.

And guys, it isn’t just a feeling this time. It isn’t the butterflies working in my stomach. And it’s not the rush I get when he kisses me. It’s the deep connection of friendship, and feeling like my needs and his needs are both met. We both can be our authentic selves. I am not afraid to be honest about my feelings or thoughts. He doesn’t reject me in any way. And I don’t reject him in the same way. This is what love really feels like. I am not just attached because I want a relationship. We are staying in each other’s lives because I think we both know that this is real love.

Roger also brought me back to my spirituality. For that, I will always be forever thankful. Meeting him has opened my eyes to the inner problems I have, and how I want to grow as a human being. Him meeting me has done the same thing for him.

We don’t know what the future holds, but we both believe hold heartedly that god placed each of us in each other’s lives for a reason. And I’m excited to find out the reason why.

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